Saturday, February 26, 2011

And it all falls down...

I haven't been sure about how to post this but I don't even know if anyone reads it but I feel like I need to get it out and admit it. My nearly 3 year relationship ended last weekend. I thought that relationship was it, that we were going to get married and be together forever. I did everything with the thought in mind that we were getting married. I moved, gave up some dreams, because I knew the dream of us was bigger and more important. But it wasn't or maybe it was, but it isn't. I wasn't getting out of it what I deserved in the past few months and it had to end. It did not end well by any means. It ended horribly. I had to move out in the middle of the week and sneak in during the days when he wasn't there to get clothes. My brother is coming here today to help get me out of there for good. It is hard, stressful, and I am struggling. I will come out a better person, a happier person, and a person who will find someone who treats her with utmost love and respect. Its a hard journey but I have amazing family and friends to help me along the way.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Who am I?

I guess I never really introduced myself. From now, you have deduced that I am a female who really likes Banana Republic and J. Crew, that was a size 4 and is now a size 2, and is running a marathon. Welp, that sums me up - thanks for reading! I kid, I kid,

I was born on a farm and have 5 older siblings. I feel like those are two things that differentiate me from most people right off the bat, that was until I moved to Kansas and lots of people lived on farms. Do I live in KS right now? Nope I sure don't! I started out on the East Coast in a little state with a bigger-than-life motto "Live Free or Die" You can go use your google detective skills and figure that one out.

I moved out to the midwest for college. I went for 4 years and graduated with a Finance degree. My only hint to you there is RUDY RUDY RUDY!

Next, I got a job that required me to live in Kansas for 9 months, and 9 long months did I ever. whew, not the state for a new grad who knows nobody at all! Let's just say I was insanely jealous of my friends in Chicago and NYC.

Next, I took my talents to Denver where I fell in love with the Mile High City. She's a beut that's for certain. I love the weather, the scenery, the people, the neighborhoods, the lack of humidity, the altitude when I went to lower altitudes and could out-run and out-drink everyone, but all good things must come to an end.

Now? I am living in Sunny Sandy Eggo. Yes, I joined the millions of Americans who migrated to So-Cal in hopes of joining the cast of Real Housewives of Orange County. Why am I here? Well I am in grad school now, changing careers, trying to run a marathon, and trying to stay afloat in this game called life.

For fun, I enjoy running (duh) less than 5 miles at a time, skiing, which I never do here, tennis (oh Novak Djokovic how I love thee from afar), reading books (see post below), playing with my pup, Wyatt Earp, and my niece and nephews.

Tell me about yourselves. What is one defining characteristic about you?

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

The 100 Top Novels

Around June 2008, I decided that I needed to become "well-read". Everyone always noted that I must be, since I read so much, but I felt like I wasn't. I mean, what qualifies you to be well-read? Is it the quantity? The quality? As determined by whom? I decided to define these subjective measures and made the decision to read the Top 100 Novels of the Twentieth Century as selected by the Modern Library. I mean, if the Modern Library did not know what was quality reading, and 100 wasn't quantity, then who does? After familiarizing myself with their website, I quickly learned that was not the only top reading list. There were also the Top 100 Novels as picked by readers and the Rival Top 100 list as picked by Radcliffe. So, because I cannot do anything halfway, or three quarters, or any easy way, I decided to read them all. There are many overlapping titles, and, as the huge dork that I am, I entered them into an Excel worksheet, just two looming titles "READ" and "TO READ".

In total there are 211 books and I have currently read 61 of them. It has been slow, since I started school and my "fun" reading time has been pushed aside by monstrous texts about bowel impaction, but I have made headway. It has forced me to read genres and titles I would not have otherwise even given a second glance. I have found some top reads and struggled through some wordy novels. I have found that Kurt Vonnegut might be for some, but is definitely NOT for me but that I really love Theodore Dreiser. And, because I know all of you, ok the 38 of you that have viewed my blog, really really want to know what I am reading. Here is my dorky spreadsheet. What is your favorite book/author/genre?

Read: great gatsby, portrait of artist of young man, lolita, brave new world, sound and the fury, catch 22, grapes of wrath, 1984, To the lighthouse, an american tragedy, the heart is a lonely hunter, slaughterhouse five, invisible man, native son appointment in samarra, winesburg ohio, passage to india, tender is the night, animal farm, golden bowl, sister carrie, as I lay dying, lord of the flies, deliverance the sun also rises, portnoy's complaint, light in august the catcher in the rye, a clockwork orange, heart of darkness, a farewell to arms, a room with a view brideshead revisited, the adventures of augie march, lord jim, the call of the wild, the magnificent ambersons, my antonia, watership down, farenheit 451, zen and the art of motorcylce maintence, the world according to garp, beloved, a prayer for own meany, to kill a mockingbird, the color purple, of mice and men, charlotte's web, winnie the pooh, their eyes were watching god, for whom the bell tolls, the old man and the sea, the jungle, in cold blood, franny and zooey, ethan frome, a separate peace, o pioneers, the war of the worlds, this side of paradise

To Read ulysses darkness at noon sons & lovers under the volcano the way of all flesh I Claudius henderson the rain king usa trilogy wings of the dove the ambassadors the studs lonigan trilogy the good soldier a handful of dust all the king's men the bridge of san luis rey howards end go tell it on the mountain the heart of the matter a dance to the music of time point counter point the secret agent nostromo the rainbow women in love tropic of cancer the naked and the dead on the road the maltese falcon parade's end the age of innocence zuleika dobson the moviegoer death comes from the archbishop from here to eternity the wapshot chronicles of human bondage main street house of mirth the alexandria quartet a high wind in jamaica a house for mr biswas the day of the locust the prime of miss jean brodie finnegans wake kim angle of repose a bend in the river the death of the heart ragtime the old wives tale loving midnight's children tobacco road ironweed the magus wide sargasso sea under the net sophie's choice the sheltering sky the postman always rings twice the ginger man the satanic verses the cunning man illusions mythago wood suttree mulengro sometimes a great notion one flew over the cuckoos nest citizen of the galaxy double star v it the puppet masters guilty pleasure the hunt for red october naked lunch arrowsmith at swim two birds the door into summer the magus the wood wife the haunting of hill house sometime wicked this way comes starship troopers the recognitions the little country ender's game greenmantle on the beach blood meridian the handmaid's tale the hitchhikers guide to the galaxy trader memory and dream one lonely night at the mountains of madness yarrow someplace to be flying fifth business wise blood absalom absalom moonheart the worm oroboros the french lieutenant's woman the stand trustee from the toolroom shane gone with the wind gravity's rainbow a town like alice stranger in a strange land the moon is a harsh mistress dune fear mission earth we the living anthem the lord of the rings battlefield earth the fountainhead atlas shrugged song of solomon portrait of a lady schindler's list mrs dalloway the wonderful wizard of oz lady chatterly's lover the awakening jazz a good man is hard to find orlando bonfire of the vanities cat's cradle the wings of the dove things fall apart rebecca look homeward angel in our time the autobiography of alice b tokias white noise the bostonians the wind in the willows babbitt the beautiful and the damned rabbit run where angels fear to tread scoop pale fire

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Runnin' with the Big Dogs

So yesterday was my 18 mile run. I woke up not feeling my best, after a few too many drinks the night before, but I chugged some water, drank my coffee, and ate my breakfast, determined to finish the whole thing. I lathered on the sunscreen and charged my Ipod, stopped at the store and got some Powerade chews (seriously the only thing I can eat during my runs!) and was off! I chose to run around Mission Bay b/c it is just so easy - all the trails are there, complete with water fountains and bathrooms every .25-.5 miles, oh and not to mention beautiful views of the Pacific!

Let's keep drilling in the point that I DO NOT feel very well and I am only getting out of my car. I start my watch, put on some tunes, and start going, already knowing this is going to be slower than normal and I just will have to slow my pace down. I am plodding along passing the usual moms jogging with strollers, families setting up barbeques and bayside bootcamp classes when up ahead I am seeing a bigger crowd and commotion. I am wondering what could be going on, I remind myself to stay on pace and not speed up, so when I finally get up there I realize - OH, I AM RUNNING ALONGSIDE THE USA CROSS COUNTRY CHAMPIONSHIPS! Seriously?!? I have never been so demoralized running.
This race was won by Shalene Flanagan, with Molly Huddle in 2nd (GO IRISH GIRL!) I mean, those girls can RUN. I felt like a little beluga whale out of water, plodding along with my fuel belt and ipod while these running gazelles whizzed by me.

Sure it helped when I found out they were professionals and that I saw some running celebs but man, knowing I had 15 miles left after running by them for a mile really really stunk. I FINISHED though! I did it and I am proud that I ran the whole thing, while being nauseous and sore the whole time.

Look for a new sale this week!

Picture credits:

Thursday, February 3, 2011


I originally titled this post "Fitness Friday" but then realized, I don't do a whole lot of fitness on my Friday, and it is more like Super Session Saturday with my long runs. Sorry a whole lot of forced alliteration there.... Anyways, Friday will find me in the Med/Surg unit taking care of patients from 6-6 and then happy hour where I will hopefully revitalize and wake up from my drug-induced (get it get it, drug induced b/c i spent the day at the hospital) coma. It is actually a sleep-deprived one but I digress. I have found that as I train for my upcoming marathon, my life completely revolves around running. When am I going to run? How far am I going to run? What do I need to bring on my run? When do I need to get up for the run, go to bed for the run? How much time do I have and how fast do I have to run to fit my prescribed distance into available running time? I think you get the point. I am in running overdrive and am so excited to *gasp* just go to the gym and read trashy mags and work out on the bike or elliptical; however, 6 weeks remain until my tortuous Sunday, replete with 26.2 miles of sweat, some happiness, mostly misery, and a big fat medal with a free (or so they claim!) massage at the end. So as I leave you now, to hopefully get in a few hours of sleep, which is also carefully planned when you have to get up at 5 am everyday for 12 hr days, my mind will be racing with well, racing! TGIF!